Whom have I in Heaven but You?
And earth has nothing I desire besides you
– Psalm 73:25
A long time ago, I was a worship leader who played in meetings and services week after week, month after month. Until, of course I burned out! Many of my readers will know of my Dark Night of the Soul, when I left behind me all things Church for fifteen years. And on each occasion that I burned out, I came closer and closer to never going back into leading – or even into Church; each time, that Dark Night beckoned. Eventually, it turned out to be exactly what I needed, but on this particular occasion the ‘only’ real thing was that I never wanted to ever hear again any of the Songs of Heaven.
Except for this one. ‘All I Desire’, from the Hosanna! Music album ‘Almighty‘. Despite everything, this one song just played over and over again in my spirit – and I didn’t mind, despite it being a Song of Heaven:
‘Oh Lord, my God, all I desire is You’.
And, you know, that was exactly what the Spirit was speaking to my heart at that time. I needed to put aside all the works, all the leading, all the action, all the ‘being indispensible’, and just concentrate on my heart’s Desire – all I really needed was Him. So, in His usual complete genius, He gave me the one song that could save my sanity, by putting my focus back on the One to Whom I owe everything.
As usual, it had taken a big crash for me to learn my lesson – if indeed I did. But anyway, here is the song. If you’re blown away by life’s pressures, or especially by ministry pressures, remember your first Love; remember that He is all you really desire, and that all the resulting works and deeds flow from Him and back to Him. Let it be effortless. let it flow from your life in the Spirit, and not from any compulsion.
Hold your ‘ministry’ lightly;
but hold on to Him tightly
(I can’t believe I just wrote that, and I apologise. Too trite for my normal style, and I don’t like ‘Christian catch-phrases’ – but I feel perhaps it’s there for for someone!) 😉
So here it is: ‘All I Desire’, written and led by Rich Gomez.
Sing it. Mean it.
O Lord, my God
All I desire is You
O Lord, my God
All I desire is You
More precious than silver
More costly than gold
No riches on the earth
compare with You
And what can this world offer
when all I desire is You
– Rich Gomez, 1992